Coaching for Performance
By: John Whitmore
If you are a life coach then I’m sure you’ve heard about GROW. If you haven’t heard about the GROW model then I suggest you get this book and do some learning. The GROW model stands for Goals, Reality, Options, Will. This book will really help your Life Coaching skills and transform your coaching so you can stand out against the rest.
This book will help you do advanced work with your clients. To be a good life coach you must be versatile in all areas. This book gives you models for psychosynthesis, spiritual intelligence, emotional intelligence and boundaries for coaching. This book talks about how to create awareness and responsibility for your clients. Having awareness is the only way the GROW sequence can be put into full action.
If you are a Life Coach wanting to expand from single clients to team coaching then this is one book you want in your back pocket. The last half of this book gives such good detailed information on coaching teams and creating a leadership situation. The GROW sequence can be used for a team as well. A lot of companies today are looking for life coaches/team coaches to come in and help transform their team. A business will never be successful without a good team behind it.
Overall if you are a Life Coach I would highly recommend this book. It has helped me in so many ways with my clients. It has also helped me in my parenting skills as well. I was able to take some of the models and apply them to my family. I have 8 kids so we regularly have to function on a team level to maintain the peace.
Chances are you have lots of beliefs about yourself and everyone else you come across. You use these beliefs to help understand why people do what they do. If someone yells at you, you might forgive them because you know they are under a lot of stress. Or, you might not trust them because you think that this person is always angry with you. Or, you might even think that deep down, they are an angry person who should be avoided at all costs.
There are probably times when you believe that a person’s actions reflect the situation they are in or their current mental state. But, you also have times when you think that a person’s actions are a reflection of their true self.
Psychologists around the world have been interested in capturing the qualities that people think are part of someone’s true self and also in understanding how the idea of a true self affects people’s actions and their relationships with others.
An interesting fact of the true self is that it seems to be a belief that is similar across cultures. That is, aspects of the true self have been explored in studies using many different populations around the world, and the beliefs tend to be quite similar.
Two core beliefs are that the true self tends to be moral and good. So, when people make a change in their actions, they are more likely to be judged as doing something that reflects their true self when they change from doing something bad to something good than vice versa. This is why someone who stops abusing drugs or alcohol is often judged as allowing their true self to come through, while someone who starts abusing drugs or alcohol is judged as suppressing their true self.
These beliefs also tend to lead people to assume that someone can change for the positive over time, even if many of their past actions have been bad. We are reluctant to decide that someone is truly evil and prefer to believe that their true self has a moral beauty that might someday lead them toward better actions in the future.
An interesting fact of the true self is that our beliefs about our true self and other people’s true selves are similar. This belief differs from the way we often treat our motives compared to those of people from a different group. Often, we assume that we and people from our group have better motives than people from some outgroup. But, we also assume that deep down (in their true self) members of other groups are good and moral people.
Why does the concept of the true self matter?
One reason, the belief in a true self affects people’s judgments about what actions give life meaning. A person might work hard at their job and also spend time with family. They might believe that their job is just something they do, but that the importance they place on family relationships is part of their true self. Meaning, the effort they put into their family relationships will give them a greater feeling that their life has had meaning than the effort they have put into their profession.
Another reason, the belief in true self can influence the treatments people will consider for mental illnesses. For example, many college students are willing to take medications for attention disorders that allow them to focus on their work. Part of the reason why they take this medication so freely is that few people consider their ability or inability to concentrate as a central part of their true self. On the other hand, many patients suffering from bipolar disorder are reluctant to take their medication, because they believe that their medication is changing aspects of their true self.
While the true self seems to be an important part of people’s beliefs about themselves and others, it is hard from a scientific standpoint to think of the true self as something that actually exists. I may believe that I have a true self, but is there actually a true self inside me? It can be useful to believe that we and other people are inherently good and moral, but that doesn’t mean that there is an inherently good and moral person lurking within every person just waiting to get out.
Last year, I left my dead end Postal Route job and I tried different ways to make money. I got myself involved in all sorts of adventures. I took risks and won some and lost some. It was hard sometimes to get back up and try again. It was hard to admit I had failed or I had been duped.
Am I grateful?
Gratitude has helped me in more ways than I can imagine.
I’ve realized when I complain, it blocks my creativity. I can’t think. I can’t produce. I need to keep coming up with great ideas and not being grateful clouds my mind.
I want to share with you what I have learned about gratitude.
Gratitude is a powerful key to unlocking your hidden potential.
I love talking about hidden potential with my clients. So many of them don’t realize what’s locked deep down inside themselves. When you are grateful, you see opportunities around you. When you stay in a state of complaint, you are consumed with yourself. This makes you lose sight of the potential within you. Complaining is actually the EGO.
Complaining aka The Ego makes you see only negativity. I realized when I had a negative mindset, I lost sight of the opportunities around me. I was focused on what I didn’t have and I didn’t look within to explore what I did have.
Gratitude increases your productivity.
Not being grateful drains you of your energy. This affects your productivity. You can’t produce your best because you have no energy.
Gratitude releases hormones within you that get you excited about life. Excitement increases your energy levels and you find yourself more productive.
Gratitude helps you achieve your goals.
Do an exercise this week for yourself. Write at least one thing you are grateful for every single day. Do this in the morning or before bed each night. You will realize at the end of the week that you have gotten to know yourself more. Through this process, you have also realized strengths you have and you need to focus on. In these strengths, lies your dreams and goals. You will have more clarity about your purpose. If you stick to this plan you will soon be unlocking your full potential.
The art of gratitude is an art you need to learn and practice daily. You cannot achieve your goals without it. You cannot fully be happy in your life without it. You will be amazed at how much your life can change just from expressing Gratitude.
If this post has inspired you, please share it with your friends and family. How has gratitude affected your life in the past? Feel free to leave a comment below.
Limiting beliefs put you in a cycle of self-destruction. You want to be successful. But you’re doing everything in your power to make sure that it never happens. How?
Because you always find a reason it shouldn’t. You could have a cure for a disease and you still would find a reason that it wasn’t the right time or that you don’t know enough yet. And you’re wasting all that incredible power you have. It’s not entirely your fault though. You’ve trained yourself to think that way. You tell yourself the story that something else is the problem over and over again until you believe it.
These thoughts are called limiting beliefs. And they’re the biggest roadblock to your success ever. The best part though about it all…You have the power to change them.
In this blog I’m going to show you how to change your limiting beliefs. By the end of this article I promise you’ll have a fool proof solution to each of your limiting beliefs.
Here we go!
1. “I Can’t Do It.”
Who said? This limiting belief is the most common limiting beliefs I hear. Yet it’s one of the biggest lies you will ever tell yourself. The root of this is the fear of failure. It’s not that you can’t do it. It’s that you’re scared that you might fail miserably if you try.
Which, technically, you might.
Ok… so what? Everyone fails at some point. If you don’t try something new your life can never change. Which is a much scarier thought than failure. If you truly don’t think you can do something, make it so easy you can’t fail.
For example, if you want to quit smoking don’t go cold turkey. If you smoke a pack day now then smoke 19 tomorrow. You could do that without even trying. You just need to take that first step.
2.“I Don’t Know Enough Yet.”
You will never feel like you know enough. This limiting belief is a lie because it’s really the fear of taking action. The truth is you won’t ever know enough. Life is about learning all the time. But knowing everything isn’t the goal. Knowing more than the people you are talking to is.
If you are wanting to start a project on something you’re passionate about: a book, a blog, a business, a website or a YouTube Channel – you already know enough to start. So take some action. Take that first step despite how much you think you know. Because as long as you know more than the average person, you’ll be fine.
3. “They Can’t Afford It.”
If you run a business this belief is on your mind all of the time. But why? You don’t know what someone can or can’t afford. Unless you have a breakdown of their monthly expenses you can’t possibly know. You’re guessing. And you’ve probably guessed wrong.
You can look at this in two different ways:
If they want it they will find the money
If they can’t find the money you don’t want them
What you’re really scared of here is rejection. That someone might not want you’re selling. But guess what? You’ve got bills you need to pay. So that’s not a worry you can entertain.
Value your time. Value your product. Value yourself. Each no is one step closer to a yes, and someone who can afford it.
4. “I Don’t Have The Time.”
You’re reading this blog post right now, aren’t you? That tells me that you do actually have spare time. That not every single minute of your day is taken up with something important. Spare time that could be spent on something important to you.
How many times do you check these each day?
Have 5 plus minutes that you just zone out
I can bet the answer is probably, ‘Too Much.’ In fact, the average person can save 45 minutes a day by not checking their Facebook feed. Again this is the fear of taking action at it’s finest. It’s just a new disguise. If time really is an issue make a set schedule and follow it.
Put that important task you’ve been putting off: reading, writing, marketing, painting– you name it – to the beginning of your day. Make it the first thing you do. You’ll suddenly realise you have a lot more time than you think. And you’ll be thankful of the results.
5. “It’s Not The Right Time.”
This is going to be hard to hear. But, there is no right time. Deep down you know it too. There are, of course, bad times to start things. If you’re laid up in bed with with a back injury, now probably isn’t the right time to commit to starting a new business.
But you’re not, are you?
Time is one of those things you have no control over. You’re just scared about what’s going to happen when you start. That you might fail. People might not like what you’re doing. That you might not even like what you’re doing. But instead of waiting for the perfect day, which rarely comes, make a start and take action. Get it going now. Forget about the limiting beliefs, because the right time will never come and this will be another regret to add to your list.
6. “I’m Not Good Enough.”
Whether you’re a world famous author or a person sitting behind a 9-5 desk job, you will never think you’re good enough. And that’s a good thing. Because when you think you’re good enough, that you’re entitled to something, that’s when you truly start to fail. Always strive to learn more. Always strive to do better. Always remember there is someone out there who is better than you are at something. But never let it stop you from doing what it is that you need to do. So, challenge your limiting beliefs and change your lifestyle.
I hope this helps give you a kick in the butt to throw those limiting beliefs out the door. Get out there and start making moves to do what you really want to do in life.